Do The Right Thing

Growing up in a traditional Filipino family on the east coast, I've become accustomed to the nuances that make our culture so fascinating. Debutante balls, Santa Cruzan's, and Fil-Am association parties defined old school social networking long before the advent of Facebook or My Space ever existed. I still crave  home cooked delicacies like my Nana's lumpia, Tita Dulce's Kare Kare, or my dad's signature steaks. Since being inducted into the Dimaya clan, I've become a full fledged aunt, sister in law and have inherited 150 more family members. Gatherings for no particular reason is still, to this day, my fondest memory of all. At these shindigs, however, it left you open for the inevitable third degree. With food in the belly and having exhausted all stories about the Philippines, somehow my aunts and uncles would then turn their attention to, "interrogation time". "How's your grades?" "Who's your boyfriend?" "Where are you going to college?" By the time I graduated high school, I was a pro at answering multiple questions. Sometimes, I'd just make things up especially when they seemed to get exasperated if I didn't give them an answer they liked. And though, at times it was terrorizing to be expected to know what the rest of my life was going to look like, I know it was done out of love...well, sometimes at least.
Now well into my 30's I feel as though those times of terror have come in quite handy. While the intensity has lessened, I'm still plagued by who, what, and where? "How's Hawaii?" "Where do you work?" I admire their skills in starting off slow but KNOW this eventually leads to the tougher, more personal subjects about marriage, money, and babies. What I've learned is that despite my expertise at mastering the 20 questions, my answers aren't always what people want to hear. But at this stage in my life, I'm not embellishing on anything. I've learned certain truths about myself, what motivates me, and why I do things. Only I know where I've been, what I've done, and how I feel and though it may not be good enough for some- I know what's right for me. When my single friends tell me they're without a boyfriend, my married friends tell me they want to have 5 children, or my daughter tells me she wants to go to art school after college...I'm nothing but thrilled. Only they can know what's in their heart, where they've been, and how they feel. Who am I to question, "Why?" And you- what do you know? Do tell...