3 years ago as our daughter was sinking into a deep teen melodramatic funk- I did what any desperate mother would do...I told her she could have a puppy. The intention was to "just look" in hopes that somehow, though utterly cute and adorable- she'd realize that owning a pet was more responsibility than it was worth. But as most of you know, stepping into a pet shop with good intentions is just like shopping at Louis Vuitton on your 10 year anniversary- whether it's a purse or a puppy...the purchase is going to happen. So there she was, laying carelessly on the bottom of a dog pile with one eye curiously looking upwards as her sisters climbed, nipped, and enticed her to play though all the while- she was having none of it. Although aloof and a lot less spunky- we felt an instant connection to her soul. She seemed curious though reserved, loving but guarded, and needy yet independent. But one thing was clear- we'd found our girl. That day, Phife Liliukalani Dimaya officially became part of our family. Truthfully, I can't recall the last time I ate dinner in peace or didn't melt at the sight of a chihuahua. I've never taken so many damn walks in my life and haven't sobbed so uncontrollably until I watched Marley and Me. And while our family has always been close, the addition of Phife- who's neither a canine wonder or social butterfly and whose main motivation lies in anything that looks or smells like meat- has taught us that being who you are is more than enough. Through her sweet but shy demeanor- she needs not lift a paw to make us love her anymore.
Which got me thinking about the other relationships in our lives- the human ones. And whether we truly accept one another for being who we are. Would I love my husband to be more domesticated and my daughter less hormonal? Of course! Could my siblings stand to be a pinch more motivated and my mom operate less on Filipino time? Absolutely! Could I learn to be more patient and less judgmental? Definitely! At the end of the day (and I mean- every single day), we're all a work in progress. Our goal in life isn't to strive for perfection or be who or what someone else expects. It's to get up and make genuine connections; to enrich our lives and the people we choose to spend it with. It's to live authentically and know that for the people that matter- you need not lift a finger to love you anymore...just ask Phife! And you, how deep is your love? do tell...
